V: I

-hour shift starting in five hours. But sleep felt impossible after the dinner at m

een the only light in my studio apartment. Outside, Seattle was finally quiet,

the world slept and I could ex

hing complicated coming up. A choice to make. I

sful-wealthy, even-but lonely in a way that money couldn't fix. We'd never exchanged specifics.

perform for each other because we didn't

d write something hopeful, something that wou

I wrote t

r D.

n't let it bother me anymore-I'm twenty-fi

my voice was white noise she'd learned to tune out. My father asked my sister about her work while I was mid-sentence a

ther people's stories. The supporting character who e

e last sentence. Too b

ers were for? Being honest in a

type

just who I am. If some people are mean

st choice? Not their backup plan or their last reso

that all

sleeve, annoyed at myself for crying over som

than I meant it to. Ig

is-I hope you find clarity. You deserv

ep w

.A

lf, then immediately regretted it. Too much

text from Elena, my cow

:** *Yo

*Unfor

ad dinner wit

* *The

ver tomorrow after your shift. I'll make mar

started working together three years ago. She insisted my family was

thing intellectually and feeling i

*I'll

ove my bed cast soft shadows on the ceiling. I'd bought them because they reminded me of s

chimed.

I needed sleep. But D.C. neve

ed the

r E.

tment that costs more than most houses, looking at a city I helped shape th

read you

tand exactly what you mean. I'm surrounded by people constantly-meetings, dinners, events-and

. Somehow,

instead of what I have. I've dated dozens of women who would marry me tomorrow, but not one of t

all of tho

ople who are too blind or too selfish to see what's right in front of them. Their

ce. You're mine. In two years of writing to you, I've never wanted to write to anyone else. I

You've alwa

family can't see

m of better things th

ou

.C

imes, tears strea

saw

didn't know, whose life existed in some parallel unive

alive some days, that he was my first choice too, that I'd rather have

oard, and my chest ached with something tha

where I kept all his letters. Two years o

d lay in the darkness, his

omeone's first ch

never see, D.C. was probably still awake, deali

t choice too. That if we ever met i

re of our connection-safe because it was

off in four hour