a

s d

ing on the other side of the bed while on the other end, I let my feet scrape on the soft light br

rom My Chemical Romance to The Paper Kites. Now, I’m listening to Turns Within Me Turns

d my sister. I could say that my mom and I are quite similar. The only exception is that I am messy, quite lazy, and not smart. For short: I’m a disappointment. If I got to be honest, I should’ve been placed in a coffin for a long time but I decided to fight back as if I got something more to show. Seriously, I daydream a lot to the point

ust to get attention? Like how people confidently tweets how ugly they are and they don’t want the face they own but they have no choice but to suffer in it. Then their followers decided to butt in and say “No you’re so pretty~” or att

ything I wish to be in and what I want to be as. Now, I have ugly thoughts stuck in my head. They’re like a combination of dirt, rocks, and lava I swallow while going on with life ‘til they curl up into one giant boulder that I want to blend into smaller portions

thers. Like the time my dad once told me he loves us and wouldn’t leave us but then the second time I asked--this time, tryi

t when we stop trusting at all because we don't know who they are and their intentions. Not even those closest to you. I just

up where they came from. Everything I see is upside down including my older sister Angelica which is standing by

pside down. I look up, finally getting to see my sister, and the whole room, right side up. My sister is wearing l

are we

She said in a cocky tone. “Ca

to my wooden closet at the very corner opposite the door, which is no

not say anything. I just look through my closet, moving racks and racks of clothing and pretending I can’t hear her. Angelica scoffed. “Childish behavior--like always. You pretend that you can’t hear me when you do! Here’s a piece of advice, Di: Fucking change yourself. Because

more than I. She kept calling him dad although he’s the one who hurt us. Well, I can't blame her, she almost had his face! Angelica looks li

nking of funny thin

t. My feet are shaking and my eyes are g

ing up to my chest. It’s just that the strings of my heart cannot hold it much longer that it wants to

ould’ve stopped beating a long time ago. But instead, I keep

m I sufferi

ed to follow like don’t commit crimes and be kind to others. But the rule book never said to not dress differently, to talk to anyone, or act the way others act!. First of all, what is this? Are we employees of the world? Second, do I have to talk to every person I pass by? And third, are we robots? We are made differently so why

l as if it’s gonna be answered. God, you are the creator of Earth. If ever yo

ard my mom fro

make matters worse. “Ma-” my voice cracked in between. Fuck! I can hear footstep

“You wanna come with us? We will go grocery shopp

e earring. Lastly, I look at her face. She’s smiling. Although she can be quite old now, she still looks like an angel who came into my room to save me. I don’t know why she looks so happy but I don’t care. I am happy to see her like this. The last time she smiled this wide was when we were kids, when my ex-dad is still with us. When

again but I’m trying not to let it fall and hope my mom never not

f I did? Maybe I’ll ruin it. Just like the last time I accidenta

Maybe n

mile drop a

n school. I-I swear I’ll clean th

do you always stay here? Aren’t you tired of it?” I just stared at

outside but I cut her off. “Mom, it's fine.

. She has said something that hurt me then but who wouldn’t want to feel the warmth and love from the one close to your heart? I still love her. She is the only one who

other’s eyes but it feels like she is looking through mine. I smiled and tried holding back my tears. She then

rned her head one last time, keeping that same soft smile. “

s my mom went downstairs. I watch my mom go down and talk a bit to my sister who is holding the door open. It did not take a while till they all went out and closed the door.

ay. A change where I could wear what I want and love who I want and be who I am without

t let people stop me this time. We need to change the rules and the stinky sy

ay. It needs to be changed somehow